Introduction
Archbishop Dr. Charles Agyinasare, Founder of Perez Chapel International, has challenged Christians to recognise that sexual unfaithfulness begins long before a physical affair takes place—it starts with desires that are entertained in the heart.
Preaching on Sunday, August 2, 2026, on “Don’t Covet Your Neighbour’s Wife,” Agyinasare focused on the tenth commandment and its implications for marriage, purity and Christian character. He explained that while other commandments regulate outward actions, the command against covetousness confronts inward desires.
“The nine, they regulate what you do… But this tenth commandment regulates what you want. Your desire,” he said.
Drawing from Matthew 5:28, he stressed that God is concerned not only with physical adultery but also with lust entertained internally: “God does not wait for the body to act before He renders a verdict. The verdict starts from the mind.”
Covetousness Is Built One Thought at a Time
According to Agyinasare, coveting another person’s spouse rarely happens suddenly. Instead, it develops progressively through uncontrolled looks, fantasies, comparisons, emotional attachments and secrecy.
“Covetousness is not a sudden event. It is a slow architecture that is built… one thought at a time,” he explained.
Using David and Bathsheba in 2 Samuel 11, he distinguished between accidentally noticing someone and deliberately continuing to look. “That first glance may have been an accident of timing. But it didn’t remain an accident. Everything after that was a decision.”
He therefore urged believers to establish their convictions before temptation arrives: “You need to make the decision before the temptation arrives.”
Agyinasare also warned against fantasy, arguing that repeatedly imagining an illicit relationship prepares the heart for eventual action. “What you rehearse repeatedly in your mind is exactly what you are training yourself to eventually pursue,” he said.
Comparison, Proximity and Secrecy Feed Wrong Desires
Another danger, he noted, is comparing one’s spouse with someone else. Such comparisons often magnify another person’s strengths while exaggerating a spouse’s weaknesses.
“Comparison is the soil coveting grows best in,” he warned, urging married Christians instead to cultivate gratitude for their spouses.
Agyinasare further cautioned against unnecessary private meetings, late-night conversations, secret messaging and emotionally charged relationships with the opposite sex.
He outlined the progression plainly: attraction can become fantasy; fantasy can produce emotional desire; desire seeks communication; communication becomes private and frequent; secrecy develops; boundaries are crossed; and physical adultery eventually becomes possible.
His advice was uncompromising: “When it starts, kill it.” He added, “It is far easier to reject a single inappropriate thought today than to dismantle a fully grown emotional affair next year.”
Love Protects; Lust Takes
The Archbishop challenged Christians to distinguish genuine love from lust.
“Lust is always asking, ‘How can she satisfy me?’ But love always asks, ‘How can I protect her dignity, her covenant, and her walk with God?’”
He argued that pursuing another person’s spouse dishonours multiple people—the person being pursued, their spouse, one’s own spouse, children and families—and can jeopardise a believer’s ministry, reputation, conscience and relationship with God.
“Love must be legitimate. Love doesn’t work in secrecy,” he declared.
Confront It, Repent and Establish Boundaries
As an antidote, Agyinasare urged believers to confront inappropriate desires immediately, honestly repent before God, discipline their eyes, end communication that feeds temptation, establish firm boundaries and deliberately redirect affection towards their marriages.
“Don’t rename lust as friendship,” he cautioned. “Confession is not weakness. It is the first act of real strength.”
He also encouraged accountability to mature Christians and pastoral counsellors, investment in marital intimacy and gratitude for one’s spouse.
Conclusion: Guard Your Heart Before You Have to Repair Your Life
Concluding the sermon, Archbishop Agyinasare stressed that the tenth commandment goes deeper than prohibiting a sexual act.
“The tenth commandment was never merely saying, ‘Do not sleep with your neighbour’s wife.’ It was saying, ‘Do not even desire her for yourself.’”
His final challenge was practical: “Guard your eyes… Guard your thoughts. Guard your conversations. Guard your devices… Honour the wife God gave you and the husband God gave you.”
For Agyinasare, protecting marriage ultimately begins with protecting the heart because God desires more than outward restraint—He desires inward purity.
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